AllieKat (2014-07-08 20:21:30)

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This is going to be my first series. If you would like it to be continued, please let me know. Please, keep in mind this is a story written to be a girls diary, not a diary.**

I don't know how to start this, so I'll just jump in. My name is Skylar Ryan Jacobson. I'm 15, and I'm depressed. The only reason I'm writing this, is because I'm being forced to. The only alternative is counseling, and I'm done with that.

I guess I'm supposed to write my thoughts, emotions, and the events of my day in here, so here goes:

You know what it's like after a mid-day thunderstorm? You look out the window,and all the colors are muted. Everything is black, white, or grey. The only coloring in, what seems the world, is the sky. Well, that's my everyday, my every night, every hour, every minute, second, of my life. The sky? That's my hope, and everyday a new cloud appears, pushing out the color, suffocating my hope. And what else? There's not much color left in my sky, not much hope left in my life.

I guess I didn't truly realize that I'm depressed until I wrote those very words. It's not that I was never told, or diagnosed, or that I didn't know what depression is, it's just that 'depressed' seems too simple, too pathetic, too eazy even, to explain my emotions. To explian my life.

This is enough for today. I promised I'd write, not that I'd waste my life, anymore than I already am, anyway. I'll leave with a question. Why does everyone try to get out of this world alive, when we're born to die?

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